on being afraid of your own power

+ the silliest Life Lesson of all

an iPhone 6 photo of Women Picking Olives by Vincent Van Gogh i snapped at MoMa right before lockdown March 2020

“We are afraid of losing what we have, whether it’s our life or our possessions and property. But this fear evaporates when we understand that our life stories and the history of the world were written by the same hand.”

-from The Alchemist

weeks ago we were sitting at our favorite pizza spot in Atlanta. the table is full because food is a love language. large pizza margherita with buffalo mozzerella, arugula salad, meatballs doused in fresh tomato sauce topped with shaved parm, two glasses of pinot noir. i’m casually blabbing on about god knows what because food excites me when suddenly my partner interjects. with the subtlest waft of annoyance he voiced something that quickly snapped me out of my hungry, airy chatter. “sometimes i feel like you are afraid of your own power,” he mustered.

well

uh YEAHHhh

i quickly agreed. he was correct.

great job.

well done

observant !

thanks, partner!!

he went on to explain and i went on to explain and i don’t remember how the rest went but i’m sure i appeared extremely casual and unfazed- a Lex Specialty.